Red, Red, You Are So Slow...

The following list are examples- from my personal experience- that will ensure you the shortest time possible at a red light. You're welcome.

1. Try putting on lip gloss. By the time you find it in your purse and get the cap off, the light will turn green. Works every time.
   
2. Try reading something interesting.
3. Your child in the seat behind you has a hand of melted chocolate and refuses to hold the equally messy wrapper any longer.
4. Your child has dropped a toy out of their reach, and will literally cease to live if you can't get it for them NOW. (The further the toy from your reach = the shorter the red).
   
5. Use this time for prime facial hair tweezing.
6. And if you want guaranteed green lights your whole way home... try hoping for a chance to stop in order to corral a bunch of oranges that have escaped from their bag and are now rolling around your feet!

Any other tips out there?